For instance: I asked Mary if she had any mouthwash. Simple question. She said "no." Simple answer.
When I got home from work that night, there was some mouthwash waiting for me in the bathroom! Awww, how nice!
Yeah, it's really nice, except the part where she bought me mouthwash:
Dear Mom,
Thanks for the thoughtful personal hygiene item, however, there are some things I should point out. I realize that this was probably the cheapest mouthwash in the aisle because its called "Inspector Hector" which sounds like some pervy guy pretending to be a GYNO in a dirty Tijuana back alley. Which leads me to my next and final point, please don't buy me things that I have to put in my mouth that sound like a pervy guy pretending to be a GYNO in a dirty Tijuana back alley. Thanks.
Sincerely Yours,
KS. I love you.
PS: I'm 27 years old. And this seems like it would cause cavities, not give me "Top Secret Bubblegum" flavor breath.
PPS: Is that a speculum in the olde Inspector's hand?
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2 comments:
Karen,
If you find Inspector whathisname pervy, I strongly suggest that you give Listerine Smart Rinse a try. It comes in two flavors and two sizes:MINT SHIELD® and BERRY SHIELD™ in 250ml and 500ml sizes.
Start a healthy routine with Listerine Smart Rinse. The anti-cavity fluoride rinse that's reassuring to moms (in this case Mary) and fun for kids (in this case Karen0. After they brush, it cleans up after them like a magnet, attracting stuff they may have missed, then shows proof in the sink of a cleaner mouth. Kills bad breath germs, too. Biatch.
Oh, while you're at it, you may also experiment with Agent Cool Blue too. It's definitely way cooler than whathisface Hector.
Check out the site that Kate Sweeney did: www.outtakidsmouths.com!!
I just read this entry out loud to Whitney and she laughed so hard at the "Top Secret Bubble Gum" flavor part that something went down the wrong pipe and she's still coughing.
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